Sobering reality...

What triggers my despair?

Sending me to to a nervous state,

Driving me towards frustration, 

Casting me out of myself.

One minute, I feel great 

Enjoying yet another sunny day.

To paraphrase Frank, 

I'm doing things my way. 

But at the flip of a switch, 

Whose whereabouts, I'm afraid, 

I do not know; 

I find myself thrust into self doubt,

Anxiety, 

Despair, 

At the weight of the world

Thrust upon my shoulders. 

Is it the weight of truth,

Showing its ugly face,

Reminding me of my responsibilities, 

To myself, 

And to my future?

Am I so far gone, 

Down the path of escape,

Of addiction, 

Of procrastination,

Of praying for things to be different;

That the thought of actually having to do something,

To build myself, 

And make my way,

Drives me to frustration? 

Sobering reality, I'm afraid, 

Is not the kind of sobering up 

I like to do.

There is no joy, 

There is no hope,

There is no pot of gold,

At the end of the rainbow. 

There is only reality

To serve as my trigger,

To bring me to realization, 

That I've got to get my shit together.